Warning Scientifically Proven Awesome T-Shirt | Laboratory Safety Humor | Scientific Validation Apparel

Description

Exercise proper safety protocols around exceptional individuals with our "WARNING: SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN TO BE AWESOME" hazardous materials documentation – because apparently someone looked at standard laboratory safety signage and thought, "You know what this needs? A formal notification system for when someone's personal excellence reaches levels that require environmental monitoring and appropriate protective equipment for nearby personnel."

This magnificently presumptuous design transforms the humble warning label into high-visibility personal advertising, using the same bright orange-and-yellow color scheme typically reserved for alerting people about radioactive materials, explosive chemicals, and other substances that could fundamentally alter their molecular composition. Except in this case, the hazardous material is your personality, and the recommended safety precaution is probably just accepting that you're going to be the smartest person in most rooms.

The vintage industrial styling suggests this isn't casual self-promotion – this is OSHA-compliant ego documentation that's been peer-reviewed by the Department of Personal Awesomeness and found to meet all federal standards for truth in advertising. Those bold block letters practically vibrate with the confidence of someone whose awesomeness has been subjected to rigorous experimental testing, statistical analysis, and probably a few control groups just to make sure the results were reproducible.

The checkerboard pattern adds that authentic "caution tape" energy, implying that your personal excellence operates at industrial strength and requires the same safety considerations typically associated with construction zones, chemical spills, and other situations where untrained personnel should maintain appropriate distance until properly briefed on handling procedures.

Technical Details

• Premium cotton blend (75% cotton, 25% empirically verified excellence)
• High-visibility safety printing using authentic hazmat color standards
• Industrial warning typography designed to be readable from significant distances
• Available in Regulation Safety Orange (pictured) because apparently awesomeness requires federal color compliance
• Pre-shrunk using controlled laboratory conditions (no actual safety protocols were violated during manufacturing)

Perfect For

• Scientists whose personal qualities have achieved measurable threat levels to conventional social hierarchies
• Anyone whose awesomeness requires proper documentation and warning systems for public safety
• Laboratory professionals who appreciate when personal branding meets industrial safety standards
• People whose excellence has been scientifically verified and now requires appropriate hazard communication

• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
• 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the center
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Haiti or Guatemala

Disclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, phthalates and formaldehyde level requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Technium Foundry LLC and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 2201 Gibson Rd., Jacksonville, FL 32207, USA or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.

Size guide