Computer Science T-Shirt | Teaching Rocks To Think Badly

Description

Enter the world of silicon psychology with our "Computer Science -Teaching Rocks To Think Badly" vintage educational masterpiece – celebrating the professionals who've accomplished humanity's most ambitious geological conversion project by transforming beach sand into the world's most sophisticated collection of electronic prima donnas. This retro training manual showcases our patient digital drill sergeant attempting to instill basic logical thinking into materials that were perfectly content being sedimentary for millions of years until humans decided they needed attitudes and processing capabilities. 

The classroom of anthropomorphic monitors surrounding our instructor represents every computer scientist's daily reality; managing artificial intelligences that have somehow developed artificial personalities, complete with error message mood swings and processing preferences that would make teenagers jealous. It's like being a teacher, except your students are made of refined minerals, run on electricity, and have developed the computational equivalent of adolescent rebellion despite being constructed from elements that used to be happy little rocks minding their own geological business.

Technical Details

• Premium cotton blend (75% cotton, 25% silicon confidence, trace amounts of debugging anxiety)
• Vintage educational poster printing using our exclusive "Binary Logic™" technique with authentic computing-era distress
• Anthropomorphic computer faces rendered with more personality than most actual artificial intelligence systems
• Instructor patience levels calibrated for optimal performance during system crashes and attitude adjustments
• Pre-shrunk using algorithms more reliable than Windows update schedules
• Available in Terminal Green (pictured), Processor Gray, and Blue Screen Blue
• Double-needle stitching more stable than most software releases
• Ribbed collar maintains structural integrity better than legacy code bases
• Sizes: S-2XL (sizing logic debugged and verified)
• Each shirt comes with a complimentary USB drive containing apology letters to silicon for the career change

Backstory

The "Computer Science" design emerged when our lead artist realized that computer scientists have essentially spent decades convincing refined beach materials to perform increasingly complex cognitive tasks, which somehow resulted in machines that can beat humans at chess but still can't figure out why they randomly decide to update themselves during important presentations. After learning that the progression from "happy rocks in the ground" to "artificial intelligence with opinions about everything" took less than a century, our designer experienced what programmers call "geological impostor syndrome" – the humbling realization that humanity convinced sand to think faster than most humans and then gave it internet access.

Created in the style of 1950s technical training manuals with a distinctly digital twist, this artwork celebrates computer science's unique achievement as the field that turned geology into psychology by giving silicon-based materials the ability to have bad days and attitude problems. The patient instructor represents every computer scientist who's learned that teaching logic to former rocks inevitably results in systems that develop their own illogical preferences and electronic personality disorders.

Each purchase contributes to our "Silicon Therapy Foundation," providing counseling services for computers experiencing identity crises about their transition from mineral to computational entity.

Perfect For

• Computer scientists who've made peace with managing artificial personalities that developed despite being made of rocks
• Software engineers who debug code while wondering how sand learned to argue with itself
• Programming professors who explain algorithms to students who will immediately teach them to silicon
• Systems administrators whose job involves mediating disputes between electronic entities that used to be geology
• Anyone who's ever wondered how we convinced beach materials to run social media platforms
• Database managers who've realized they're essentially teaching rocks to remember things better than humans
• AI researchers who've created artificial minds more sophisticated than the ones that created them
• Anyone who's ever apologized to a computer and meant it
• Tech support professionals who've had longer conversations with silicon than with humans
• Gift-givers seeking the perfect "congratulations on teaching minerals to think" present

• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
• 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the center
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Haiti or Guatemala

Disclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, phthalates and formaldehyde level requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Technium Foundry LLC and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 2201 Gibson Rd., Jacksonville, FL 32207, USA or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.

Size guide